1
The act of getting too drunk and trying to tell people how drunk you by using the word either smashed or hammered. But seeing that your so drunk you can't talk, in the middle of your sentence you get real confused and the word "schmammered" slurringly comes out of your mouth.
2
> Amanda put down her drink, looked me in the eyes, got real excited and said, "Schmaynard, I'm Schmammered."